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Faith

Streams of black engulf me
While wordless cries escape
Spawning frantic bubbles
That spell out my own fate
Every day is harder
And darker than the last
I feel alone and empty
Wrung out by my past
I wish I had the answer
But I’m too scared to think
That way lies such darkness
It leads me to the brink
Of saying I let go
Of everything I love
Of saying there’s no hope
Of finally giving up
So here I sit and wait
As waves wash over me
I’m shaking from the water
Frigid as could be
And asking constantly
Why am I so lost
What is wrong with me
That I can’t find my God
My Lord and Savior lives
I know this to be true
But with darkness blinding me
I feel I act the fool
Jesus said He’d give me peace
Understanding couldn’t grasp
But all I feel is broken
Hurting first to last
I know the promises He makes
He’ll forever keep
I know that He is with me
As this black I try to beat
But I can’t feel His love
Or rest, now filled with hope
Depression stays with me
And I just try to cope
People say I don’t have faith
For fighting with this black
But I say though I struggle
It’s not faith I lack
My faith is just as strong
As anybody else
I may not always feel
God reaching down to help
But I’ve learned to simply trust
God always stays with me
Holding me, comforting
His presence is the key
I may never break the chains
Darkness keeps me in
But through it all, God’s deep love
Restores me once again

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